Welcome to our bimonthly newsletter

NO WAY R.A.

created by Cheryl Dellasega

edited by Brook Noel

 Welcome readers! This newsletter represents a unique partnership between myself and  Brook  Noel, CEO of Champion Press.  Our passion for helping adult and young  women fulfill their dreams brought us together several years ago; now we're collaborating on an exciting and fun line of products devoted to  helping  girls overcome  relational aggression or "girl drama." (And yes, we like  to send each other collages too!)

In each newsletter, you'll find information and activities you can use  to  tackle the thorny problem of girl bullying, which is often subtle but  devastating.  Call it drama, verbal violence, or word wars, the official term  "relational aggression" or RA is the use of a relationship rather than  physical force to hurt another person.  Gossip, manipulation, betrayal,  cliques, techno "trash talk" and a host of other behaviors are ways girls tell  me they hurt other girls.  Our goal is to empower young women to learn  positive relationship
 skills--the kind that last a lifetime and lead to success  in endeavors
 far beyond the middle school hallways.

In each free newsletter you'll find:

• Activities and ideas to implement with girls

• Facts and quizzes to expand knowledge

• Product announcements and tools to help

• Updates on Club and Camp Ophelia programs

• A printable activity

 If you have a particular topic you'd like to see addressed in the
 newsletter, or a question about girls, don't hesitate to email us
 at opheliasmother@aol.com 

We appreciate your support in creating safe places for girls.

Cheryl Dellasega, Ph.D.

A Cool Activity for Girls:

Friendship Patches for Backpacks!

Supplies: pieces of fabric or iron-on fabrics, scissors, fabric paint, glitter glue, markers, any other craft supplies to decorate (be creative!), and an adult to supervise

Directions: Get together with a group of friends. Have an adult supervise the     activity (it can get a little messy).

Cut out the fabric into whatever shape you desire. Use paint, markers, glitter or anything else you want to create a patch that represents what you think friendship is. You could create a picture of something you and your friends enjoy doing, or any symbol of friendship. After you and your friends have created your patches and let them dry exchange them with one another. You can put them on your backpacks or purses and wear them around all year long.

 Quiz: Test Your RA Knowledge

1. Which strategies are not ones that girls typically use to bully each other?

                 a) e-mail

                 b) gossip

                 c) punching, hitting, etc.

                 d) exclusion/ cliques

2. True or False: Girl bullies, unlike their male counterparts, are usually attractive and popular.

3. Which can be a response among victims of persistent or intense relational aggression?

                 a) depression & even suicide

                 b) eating disorders

                 c) school phobias

                 d) all of the above

4. True or False: Aggression is often a learned behavior and can be unlearned.

5. Which are prime sites and/or situations for girl—girl bullying?

                a) cafeteria

                b) being a new girl

                c) boyfriend competitions

                d) all of the above

You'll find the answers to the quiz at the bottom of the yellow column.

Role Playing

One of the essential ingredients of Club & Camp Ophelia is a very specific process called the RA Role Play Replay™.  Over the course of several sessions, girls write about and act out real situations involving RA.  They then create a “before and after” role play which is professionally videotaped.  The completed video is then used to further educate girls on communication and relationships. 

Why is this kind of role playing important?  First, it allows girls to share painful situations anonymously—each scenario is written so that no one knows who the author or the identity of the girls involved. Second, when the written scenarios are shuffled, redistributed, and read aloud, girls discover that they are not alone.  Many of their peers are also dealing with situations such as gossip, exclusion, cyber-RA, betrayal, etc.  Third, when the role plays are acted out, girls get to experience the role of bully, victim, and bystander.  Studies suggest that having aggressive girls participate in role playing can help promote feelings of empathy.  Fourth, the resolution of conflict through the role play offers girls a “tool kit” of strategies that can prepare them to cope with future situations.  Lastly, the role plays are carried out in a way that is just plain fun for girls!  This issue's printable, sample cards from the PowHer Game for role play.

Click here to download the free printable.

Click here to learn more about, or order, the 60 card PowHer Card Game.